August  12th, Tuesday, AD 2003 Last Comments until August 19th or so and VIMUG Picnic at STCC the 21st.

Well I am finally up but not feeling all that clear.  I must pack my stuff to go to Missisippi after the internship and deal with the bike that was found with a flat tire when I went to ride home Sunday.  I ate yesterday for breakfast and Sukpper.  I will eat before leaving tonight and that will be my lst meal until Friday, unless I eat on the train, which I might do.  I have the tickets and I MUST take the bus back, that will be an experience.  When I get back one fo the first things to do will be to arrainge for a UHaul truck to get my stuff back from here to the Berkshires.  I mkust be out of Amherst and the room by 11pm on Wednesday, August 20th.  The Valley Interface Macintosh Users Group PICNIC is Thursday, August 21st at Springfield Technical Community College at 6pm on the "green" at the college.  WE agreed on that spot so that if the weather should turn rainly or very hot we can go inside to the air conditioned building.  Rich Burns and others will report on MacWorld.  I hope to put a few posters up at the UKniversity before Tuesday is overwith so that if folks want to they can come down.  Looka like people are very busy and we might not have a large turnout.  I must leave right now for the internship.  I hope to have the following e-mail account active by September and do not know if I will be allowed to access this account after August 20th.  August 20th - September 2nd I can only use text-only e-mail at CKjohn316@juno.com and then after September 2nd I hope to have the aol accoutn active again at Cknight4u@aol.com and I would hope to hearr from you often.  My Telephone number is restored at 413  732-7077 and messages can be left there for me but it would be best if you e-mailed me in late August.  I have written all of this just in case I don't get to updating this until September.

August  11th, Monday, AD 2003 Weekend troubles and Joys.

I spent Friday back here so happy that I got some coding to work.  Then Mike took me down to the Picnic at Springfield Lodge #235 at the hall as they had predicted much rain, instead it was sunny.   IHe also dropped me off at St. David's just before 4:45pm so I could vest and serve as LEM as schedualed.  Our Junior Warden (now the senior offical of the church after the Senior Wardon's resignation due to health problems) and family treated me to Supper and then brought me to the train station so I could buy my ticket to Meridian, MS.  I wanted to go up to the Berkshires and called Alice, but from the sound of her voice I guess she has the wood arrainged ok, and it is predicted for heavy rain and thunder showers there.  Also I am so very tired and exhaused.  I just do not want to stay in Springfield any more than I need to.  I want to return to my nice room at Prince Hall in Amherst.  I am so tired.  So I took the bus back to Amherst but still could nto sleep, wondering what I should do.    I wrote an e-mail and then at 7am went back to bed.  I thought of getting the 8:55am bus that should get me to Lee by 11am.  But the weather forcast is for 70% chance of heavy Thunder Showers and I feel I should have things outside while I work on stuff.  Just as I am thinking about this Andrea Watson calles and invites me over to see her New Apartment at North Village.  I agreed to go right after Chruch and wanted to get back before the heavy rains that were predicted.  The rains never came and I went to go back to get some money to buy a vcr from her.  As it happened, my tire was flat and I had to take the bus to the fine arts center and pusha nd carry the bike back to the dorm.  I chained it up outside.  I got to bed and then today tried to do some work at the internship.  I am so scared when a day like today happened and I just can not think.  So many narcolelptic evernts and my hands tingle and I seem to pass out and oh I just can't put into words the feelings of impending death I seem to have.  Wes Carr called from New York state and asked for someting and will mail stuff to me.  I was to e-mail him with my address here.  I now have all the tickets and must pack clothe ether before or after work tomorrow.  I feel so strange tonight. Andrea called and I will see her at the internship to get her carrier back to her.

August  7th, Thursday, AD 2003 The trip that did not happen.

I got down to Springfield, talked withthe folks at the Bookstore, does not look goof for a job there at STCC.  Marilynn drove me up to the spot to meet with the fellow and yet his car was not there at 4:15pm.  I waited until 4:37 and then went out the side gate and down to Byers Street.  The phone had been turned on I called alice.  She will see if something happened to Jim.  I am so discouraged.  And it is going to rain yet again.

August   4th, Monday, AD 2003 Report on the Berkshire Trip.

Alice took me around and boy did we viist people and go places.  I bought a skill saw and some wood.  It took all the "extra" money I had in my "savings" for the wood an it will be delivered Friday.  The hope is to come up Thursday and then put in the flooring as Steve hopes to get the van and then bring me up with most of the stuff from the nice room here.  WE went on a nice "Mystry Ride" with West Stockbridge Grange after Church, it rained a greeat deal before that trip.  Then we had gotten up early in the morning and went to Otis for thier church service at St. Pauls.  The building has connections to Boston and Paul Revere.  We went up to St. George's in Lee and the Rector there is helping me with the Telephone at Byers St
Mike Beauleu I met with at 5 and he took me to the Amherst Lodge (IOOF) picnic.  It was a great event and such great fellowship with everyone pitcheing in to help and then some good talk around in a circle afterwards..

August  1st, Friday, AD 2003 Up to the Berkshires.

I finally got something working and then got a bus down early to Springfield and just barely got a ride with Jim.  It is so good to get back even though I have not been able to use the telephone.  I have had the time extened until Monday to try and gett the phone restored at Byers Street.  I will sleep tonight at Alilce's place and then tomorrow at the house.

July 31st, Thursday, AD 2003 The month changes and this week we had a breakthrough

The day had a breaktrhrough.  My supervisor explain some things to me and I understand now more of what we were trying to do.  I had read much but had the worng Idea of what we were to accomplilsh.  Made final arrangements and will go up to the Berkshires tomorrow.

July 27st, Sunday, AD 2003 More bike riding with new tire.

This morning I went to Grace Eposcopal Church in Amherst and rode the bike some more.  It is such a joy to use the bikepath.  I note that there are less than 25 days left in this internship and I have not been able to accomplish what I feel I have been assigned.  I feel so much of a failure at times.

July 26th, Saturday, AD 2003 Picnic is at Forest Park for Phi theta Kappa Regionally

This was a wonderful event. People came from Maine to near New York city.  We did not get to doing a roundtable discussion about the captere activities but at lest 6 seperate conversations were held with much fellowship  This was a neat regional event and I thank Judy King for coming down and picing me up. She also drove me up to get my bic

July 21st, Monday, AD 2003 Report on the rest of the bike route and an evening event.

Yesterday morning I worked again on correcting this page in Composer, that comes free with Netscape 7.1 for the PC.  I also got up to Grace Episcopal Church for the 8am service a little late, there were over 75 in attendance.  I then biked the rest of the Norwottuck Rail Trail  and the C. Arnold trail extension that brought me all the way to the Belchertown line.  Bicking back I was in time for lunch at the University.  Iip ut the bike in the room and then as I was going down I came out of the elivator and by the elivator door on the 1st floor was a radio/music/cd system main body, next tot the door to the trash room.  It did not look like trash, but if I left it I thought some one would take it.  So I brought it up to my room to test it and if it was ok, to bring it to the cluster office when it opened at 7pm, it must be sombody's.  As it was seconds later a lady answered the door asking "can I have my radio back?"  I was so glad to give it to her and helped her move her stuff in.  I did not expect that someone would be moving in at 12 noon.  I guess she did not understand that it was a trash room right next to the elevator and that if she could move in when the cluster office was open they could loan her a flat hand truck to move everything on.  The dorm really has some nice amenities. 
I ate then and went back to the room and typed some letters in the afternoon.  I had been given a flyer at church so I bicycled over the the "Route 9 collective" which is a communal grouping of people right on the Norwottuch Rail Trail bike path. (Stopped at Walmart, but no lights available, and stopped at Barnes and noble for a book on Digital Photography as I really need to learn how to take better pictures with this low-end Cannon camera.) I also talked with some folks on a chaise at Walmarik and we discussed the redesigning of it so that the back could fall back to make a bed - even make a frame so it could be used in the winder a foton, and tolk a pretty bicycest as I was gettin a soda about the event I was riding to.)
The event had lituratue (really left wing and socialist stuff mostly), looked like a "hippy" gathering from the early 70's, with that same sensue of mission, zeal, and wanting to "get in touch with" our bodily feellings and a sense of where we belong in a larger and interactive and intersupportive community.  There was some food, but I had spent most of the money I had so all I could do was to sit and talk with folks and sip on the water bottle of stuff I brought.  Michaleann Beawsee from Arise for Social Justice in Springfield, MA (I had been a board member there at one time) was there and introduced me to some current memberso of thier Board of Directors and other folks.  One of the ladies, a woman by the name of Christina, knew about Perl and what I am to do at the University and we had some animated talk about that.  I stayed for the "oilagarchy" political satire that they put on, and regardless of your position on the issue of oil and politics the enthusiasm and manner in which this play/scit/puppetshow/slide-show event was put on was very professional and worth the suggested donation of $5-$25.  The main thrust was about replacing our depenency on ail with something else and one of the solutions being promoted was "bio-desiel" fuel, which they make and run thier bus on.  This group apparently tours the US in this bus putting on these shows. I met a man, Jonathan Mark, who puts a page out at FlybyNews.com that he bills as Free Independent News.  Also some folks that are having a camping, workshops like Cob Building, Massage, Backyard Foraging, Permaculture, "Our Relationship with Microbes" and Progressive Democrates of MA.  This event is to be held atthe Earhlands, 39 Glasheen Road, Ptersham, MA August 1-3rd and a contact for this $20-$100 tenting event (bring your own tent) might be through Adam at (978) 724-3428 or e-mail at ahurter@wesleyan.edu.  I also picked up an issue of a publication of the Valley Anarchist Organization that lists a URL of www.homemadejam.org/vao.  I list these things so you can get a "feel" for where these people were "comming from"  and to report that some of the desire for a society more supportive of each other as individuals may have returned along with the style in clothing that we wore in the late 60's and early 70's.  Please pray for these people that God will show them the right direction to go in, that thier efforts not be "coopted" by others with more selfish agendas, and that they might develope a sweet spirit as well as thier protest against the evils they percieve in this world.  It was so much like stepping back in time that I wish you could have experienced this with me.  I have the flyer out as I conclude this fairly lengthy posting and it is billed as "the Root 9 collective" and "Liberty Cabbage Theatre Revival" invite you to a "Dinner Theater Under the Stars" and put the location as 68 Russell St, Hadlley.  6:30 had info table and Radical Music with Chris Dooley Spinning Pllitical Hip Hop & Afrofunk Beats.  7pm the Vegetarian/Vegan Buffet Dinner. 8pm Surprise Local Acts (this was an opportunity for anyone to perform which a few youngsters took advantage of, of the some 200 people there, most were into after dinner conversations, shoulder massages, etc. And then at 8:30pm the "latest multimedia show-'Oligarchy' a tragic comdey about oil's history and ties to oppression/war".  The flyer concluded with a note that this was on the bike path  and "we strongly encourage folks to ride their bikes to the event.  Call (413) 786-4792 for more info and  ask for Erika.
Wow, was not this a long posting.  I got back in the dark again so I had to use the highway and it was about 10:45pm when I went to use the toilet.  A neighbor was there in the hall at Prince Dorm, and we discussed his thesis project and the work I am tryiong to do.  We also branched off into other topics and we conclude afer midnight.  The whole day was as if I had returned to my youth again.  Oh, do please join me in praying that our youth aare directed to help build a world of peace but in doing so they not forget God  and thus loose out on one of the most satisfying aspects of such a peaceful world.  This all got me to thinking most of the night and realize I am not rally alligned with either political party and maybe neither political party in this country represents the will of the people.  God, I think, has other tasks for me to do than to form a new political party.

Tonight I am supposed to go to a "clean-up" event called a "work party" with my lodge, Springfield # 235, IOOF.  But with the predicted bad weather and my transportation not there now I don't know if I can get down there.  The reality of it all is that after yesterday's look int the past and hpe for a future we also have the demands of today, and I jsut might not be able to get away.  So much to do, and I still seek your prayers as I attempt to learn Object Oriented Perl and put together the code my Boss in asking for.  Thanks.  I might not comment again here until next monday when I report on the Phi Theta Kappa regional Picnic at Forest Park in Springfield, schedualed for next Saturday, July 26th, at 10am.

July 19th, Saturday, AD 2003 Another Great Blessing!!!.

I have been so consumed with the concerns about the "heart" problems this week that I sort of dreaded trying to get down to Springfield.  It was such a lazy morning here that I just enjoyed the morning and tried to work on the computer.  You guessed it didn't you, I got about 4 hours of work done and when I saved it all the image links, etc. were relative to the computer and not the file and hence nothing worked.  I will try and fix this, but untill I do get it fixed, please bear with just text on this page.  I worked on downloading Dreamweaver or Go-Live, but neither would get put on this compuer as a "try-out" version.  Next I downloaded and installed Netscape 7.1 which has composer (apparently FrontPage Express is no longer being given out free, they want you to edit such pages in MSWord.  Don't do it gang, the code is bloated and ugly!!!!)  At any rate I worked until about 12, noon, and just as I attempted to save, the compluter crashed--darn PC--and I lost about 3 hours of work or more.  I had just relinked all images on this page!
   I got frustrated and just saved it all and that was that.  I called ukp the PVTA (Pioneer Vallely Transit Authority) and the fellow said that yes I could get a bus down to Springfield.  I would take the bus # 43 from U. Mass to the Edwards Church in Northampton.  Then I cross overe the street to the Academy of Music and take the bus # 48 down toe Holyoke.  From there I take the Purple bus # 21 to Springfield.  I said I had a bike and he said there would be no problem through to Holyoke and maybe now to Springfield as well.  I had seen bikeracks also on buses in Springfield so I thought it might be ok also.  As it was that I could take the 2pm bus I went down to the Berkdhire Dining Commons for a meal.  Then I biked up to Haigis Mall and soon the PVTA bus arrived and the man instructed me on how to put the bike on the rack.  In Northampton I had to use the toilet but the town facilities were no longer open to the public.  After much looking a bar was open and let me use thier bathroom.  Next I got on the bus # 48 with an ok but not to helpful driver.  (She just expected you to know a lot of things that a first time rider did not know.)  Part way down to Holyoke she stopped and let a man and his bike off.  She went on a few feet and told me I should get off there also, as there would NOT allow bicycles on the Purple 21 bus to Springfield.  I said ok and she rounded a corner and let me off.  It was now about 3:15pm.  It took me a few moments but soon I was pushing myself to try to get to Springfield and then Agawam.  That bus driver thought it was 40 miles from that point to Springfiel, I hoped she was wrong, becasuse if she wwas right I had no hope of getting to church in time to serve as LEM (Lay Eucharistic Minister).  I stopped at a gas station/convience store and they knew only that it was a 10 minute ride by car.  I aske how fast the car would be going and he seemed surprised that I would ask and I had to explain how I would use that information to compute the distance.  From that point it was deduced that it might be 10 miles or so, and now it was about 3:40pm.  I "tore" out of there as fast as my legs could go and my heart was not liking the strain.  I onlly knew that I HAD to get to church by 4:30 and was aksing God to help me get there in time.  I believe that He did  as when I got down to the turn-off from route 5 to West Springfield it was about 4:pm, and when I got down past the Big E and past the bridge to go up Springfield Street at where Ames used to be it was now 4:15pm.  Only about 5 or 8 minutes later I was at the church parking lot and no one else was there other than a parishioner mowing the grass.  I checked out stuff at the "Beaver" campground next door and then talked with the parishioner until his wife and family came with some nice ice cold water for him.  Alan arrived and he had forgotten that we had switched days so he let me in and then we arrainged tht he would take next Saturday so I did not need to come down and he could go back home to his family and the guests that had arrived. I just got washed and changed into a clean shirt and vested and it was 5 minutes before the service.  Father Dee Bright gave me teh hymn we are to use as the processional and I told the congregation only moments after llighting the candles.  After church I got in my other shirt again to ride up and another parishioner gave me a ride --ALL THE WAY TO NORTHAMPTON to the Bikeway entrance !!!!!!!   I then took that very enjoyable ride to Amherst on the Bike Path.  I did stop off at WalMark and got a part exchange to the tension rod I had obtained Friday night (the bolt and nut did not match thread size) and then went into Barnes and Noble.  There Elizabeth Rosso and her husband said hellp.  Liz and I sometimes work together at the sime site wheren I am an intern and she was active in the Computer Club at STCC when I was its president.  I took to much time there and finally bought a book on UNIX from the sale table for $5.23.  I had bought one form that same table Friday on Java for also $5.23.  I got back via the main road as that had some light, at about 10:30pm!  I just spent to much time in the bookstore.  I also took many more pictures of the bike path and its many amenitie.  I hope to go to church in Amherst, eat at the Dining commons and just have a restful afternoon.  . Do please write me or e-mail me here at charliek@oit.umass.edu   This has been a very enjoyable day after all and I have been greatly blessed.  I might not write again until I report on the Phi theta Kappa regional picnic that is being hosted by my chapter at STCC that is being held at forest Park.  Take a look at my web-page at the University at http://people.umass.edu/charliek/ for more information  I am writing this Sunday moring and I have but 15 min. to get dressed and up to church in Amherst..

July 17th, Thursday, AD 2003 Report from U. Mass.

I have been so busy here at the University of Massachusetts that I have not written a thing. I have gone back to my dorm at Prince House, and just went to bed. I have had what seems to be llittle heart attacks and many narcoleptic episodes lately. Please continue to pray for me. The arthritic pain is much worse as well. My e-mail address is <charliek@oit.umass.edu> and snail mail (USPS) at the Univerisity until August 19th is:
Charlie Knight, UMass. Prince House
286 Sunset Ave, RM# 442A, Amherst, MA 01003 .       Tel. (413) 546-6943              Daytime Tel. (413) 577-2420    at Lederle GRC # A147

Here is a link to my personal start page that will give you links to look at the dorms, where I am as a network support services intern, weather for Amherst and Great Barrington, and University News to mention a few and the time in each zone of the continetal US.

I will try and update this page more often on the weekends. I do not readily have the software I was using on my computer. Do please write me.

July 16th, Wednesday, AD 2003 Please Pray for Me!!!

I in did not feel well Monday.  Tuesday I had a really rough day and I guess I might have had anotehr heart attack then.  Nothing much seems to be getting done this week (should have gone to MacWorld) and I am so scared.  Three days now I was going to do laundry but about all I could do is get to bed after supper.  The brain does not want to think and I have e-mailed people to tell them how much I appreciated them.  It is a sense that the "end" is comming and there might not be much I can do about it.  Please pray for me, and that my spirit be fashioned sweet.

July 13th, Sunday, AD 2003 Bad day turns into a great Bike Ride

I got doen to sserve Saturday at St. David's and one of the othr LEMs said he wanted to serve and I said OK.  The impression I got was that people who were not directly involved witht he 5pm Saturday sservice had not seen me around and so "no one" knew where I was. I just kept quiet and counted the additional costs (about $15-$20) for this trip.  I could not easily get back to Amherst so I went back to Byers street, did some laundry, and spoke to Steve about helping me move my belongings from the Univeristy to the Berkshires August 9th, or that weekend.  That night I went up to the Big Band Concert with dancing at the Armory, after talking with a person after church.  That congreagation has changed, do please pray for Saint David's Episcopal Church in Agawam, MA  I got the bus up at around 8 and got to the Dorm and checked my e-mail.  Shure enough, I was supposed to be either in Main or at a picnic in Naugatuck, CT.  I rushed right up to the bus station in Amherst, it was to late, I could nto get to Naugatuck until about 2pm, and the picnic would be over with by then.  I went to Grace Episcopal Church in Amherst, I enjoy the clergy (Rob) there, and often attend teh Thursday Evening Healing Service there.  The church was giving away some books, so I took some and then stopped at a tag sale on the way back to the Dorm.  I got a "serenity" prayer hanging, a copper covered jellow mold I can hang on wall and a hot-air pop-corn poper(looks in real bad shap)  I ate at the Franklin Dining Commons (The Copper Kettle), and then went for a bike ride with a book to read.  Oh what a great trip that was.  It is called the Norwottuck Rail Trail that was created and is maintained by the Commonwealth of Massachusetts,  Dept. of Consrvation and Recreation, and it follows a discontinued rail bed from a point  on the eastern side of Amherst to across the connecticut river into Northampton.  I accessed it from my Dorm complex where they have a bikeway connector that joins on about 1/3 of the way towards Northampton  It was such a nice ride, with much of it covered in greenery. Picnic tables along the way, a cut off at two malls and a spot towards the northampton end for free water and air.  I traversed throug a rout given by teh park attendent to the other bikepath in Northampton and then took it to Look Park.  This path is not so good and has many intersections and looks like it was built by a highway crew that viewd bicycles as an evil menece. At Look Park I used "the facilities" and then rode over by the pond and watched peole play in paddle boats, mallard come and eat, and a couple obviously in love.  I will want to show the pictures I took there also when I get space to put them up.  I read part of that book in soliltude and ate a cookie or two, then a band set  up and I llistend to some more "big band" music. I did nto want to do so, but left at 6:30pm so I could get back.  I stopped but for a moment at a store but towards the Amherst side it was to dark and almost ran into people riding on both sides of the bikeway.  I will need to get the generator light on the bike sunday.   So a day that started out bad turned out really nice and I praise God for that.  I did not think I deserved such pleasure.

July 6th, Sunday, AD 2003 Mow, Mow, Mow and somewhere in between the 4th of July !!

I got off early Thursday, and was going down to Springfield by bus, it is required that I be there at least one night every 30 days, so I have tired to do that.  I also could take the bus up to Lee directly from U.Mass (Friday the 4th).  After e-mailing Alice, I got the early bus up Friday and Alice met me and brought me up to visit with Peggy Phillips in New Marlborough.  I fear Peggy does not understand things from my point of view and thinks I am going off in my own "direction".   She said I had turned out just like my Dad, oh and I had tried so much NOT to do that.  But leaving that cursing, Alice brought me down to my Dad's place and while she rested and read I mowed the lawn.  Alice had to leave and I continued to Mow.  About 8 hours later, and into Saturday, I finally called it quits.  I stayed at Alice's home Saturday night as a storm was expected.  I had put ukp a large tent that had leaked last year and enjoyed the time at the home.  We had spent much of Saturday putting up blinds in the front rooms.  Still more to go up, and I need to get smaller blinds to really fit the windows correctly.  Sunday we truddged all the stuff I was brining back to Amherst up to Church in Lee.  Alice goies to Saint George's Episcopla Church in Lee, and when it the Berkshires that is where I attend also.  This is the church her husband attened until his untimely death, and Alice has continued a member there. After the service Alice Davis and I went to Price Chopper and got Ice Cream and potatoe salid and other stuff and went back to the church memorial garden and had a really nice picnic.  The Rector, Noel Bailey, came by and sat with us for a bit and then walked us down to the bus, which I appreciated greatly.  I went from Springfield straight up to Amherst--it was so good to be home.  Alilce had helped me measure out the outside of the house in New Marlborough, I will try and make that into word drawing. The kitchen beams have given way in Dad's side and soon I need to get up and open up the porch area and try and get more air under the house, or it will all rot out.  I think with all the dew houses and dynamiting that the aquafer may have changed and hence the moistue and mold in the cellar.  So much to do, but I am committed to have that house usable, at least some of it by June/July 27 (the 20th Anniversary Harold's death) next year.  

June 29th, Sunday, AD 2003 Back from the Regional Officers Planning weekend, Concord, N.H.

I will have to try and get pictures of this up for you also.  My what a working weeking.  Meetings, Meetings, Meetings.  I did larn thoguht that I am not the planning and wait and see guy that I thought I was. We have 8 regional officers in Phi Theta Kappa - New England Region this year.  What a task this will be to have us work together.  BUT, we did fashion a framework for now and the future.  Dian Hutchins was selected as our President,,  she was drafted much against her own will, but she has been the "right hand person" to our coordinator, Judy King,  and so she was the logical person for us to select to be the main contact person between Phi Theta Kappa International and the New England Region.  I was selected as "Central Tier Vice President which mainly means I have the oveersight to encourage the many chapters in Massachusetts.  We have a rafting trip coming up in Maine that I would like to go to, but I rear the money and my own stamina might not be up to it.  It is July 13th, and I believe I am schedualed to serve as LEM at Saint David's in Agawam then.

June 15th, Sunday, AD 2003 Back from the Phi Theta Kappa International Honors Institute

I just returned back from the International Honors Institute in Washington, DC.  I stayed at the American Catholic University and my room mate was a fellow from Canada.    I had some difficulties while there, like the minor heart problems I have been having.  One of the ladies in the discussion group I was assigned to asked about me and she told her two friends that I was not well.  From that moment on mary and the other three angles from God surrounded me and had me sit with them and in short turned a scary situation into something great for me.  I should have been with the rest of our regional officers, but I spent the time with these wonderful women.  One, Lorelie, even invited me to go with her and a f4th lady that was with us often to Mt. Vernon.  I dropped all planes to go job seeking and went.  I was really concerned at one point that I might not make it back from this trip alive.  I will try and make a page with photos somewhere so you can see some of this, but I have no space on this server left.  Ailyn, pronounced like Eileen,  spent some special time with me after the dance last night.   We talked a great deal.  She is a christian lady with a neat husband.  She has been through a lot, many things like I have experienced, and she will be praying for me.  We talked of love and marriage andd how she prayed to God and He provided just the right mate for her.  She feels the same could be true for me also.  All I know is that at times like these when I have the difficult heart problems, I am not comfortable being alone.   Truth of the matter is that I want to share with another human and receive from them the afformation that I mean something to someone.  When you are facing what may be possible death, it is no fun to go through this alone.  It is about 1am on Monday before I can get back to bed in this Dorm room at U.Mass.  Oh how I love it here.  I went to sleep looking out my window past the trees to the tower library at the University.  I had forgotten how much I loved being at the University of Massachusetts, in Amherst, MA.

June 1st, Sunday, AD 2003 Stuff in Storage and Up to U.Mass. !!!

Church in the morining and then the rest of the sort and box.  Steve Wine, a brother from Amity Lodge # 172 agreed to help me and we secured a van and brought a good deal of my stuff up to Amherst.  I got started late but we checked in at about 10pm.  I think it might have been midnight before Steve left for Springfield. All are welcome, so please stop by and see me.  My phone number is (413) 546-6943 and I am in room # 442A of Prince House (Hall) in the SourthWest Residenial Area of the University of Massachusetts.  The mailing address is 286 Sunset Ave., RM 442A, Amherst, MA 01003.  Tomorrow I go to the Lederle Graduate Research Center, Low-Rise, and meet the other interns and start this internship.  What a blessing, but please pray for me as this is a large task and my future may depend on how I do here.

May 25th, Sunday, AD 2003 I.O.O.F. Memorial Service at Lodge 235!!

I intend to go to church in the morining at Christ Church Cathedral. Then up to Springfield Lodge # 235 and the Memorial Service.
The service is at the Springfield Lodge Building at 44 Berkshire Avenue. All are welcome, so please come and join me.

May 24th, Saturday, AD 2003 So tired but need to work on the room!!

I worked on this page the first half of the day. Lots of rain The afternoon has to be devoted to cleaning this room!.

May 23rd, Friday, AD 2003 More work on sorting stuff !!

This morning I set the train travel and will pay for it and get the tickets Monday. They said that would be OK. I will have the following itinerary.

I got some savings and I will be able to do the whole trip for under $200, now to raise the money.

To Washington, DC
Service	From	On	Departs	To	On	Arrives	Accommodations
497	Springfield, MA	06/07/2003	07:25 pm	New Haven, CT	06/07/2003	08:45 pm	Unreserved Coach
169	New Haven, CT	06/07/2003	09:11 pm	Washington, DC (US)	06 /08/2003	02:25 am	Unreserved Coach
Return to Amherst, MA
Service	From	On	Departs	To	On	Arrives	Accommodations
164	Washington, DC (US)	06/15/2003	09:25 am	New Haven, CT	06/15/2003	02:36 pm	Unreserved Coach
464	New Haven, CT	06/15/2003	03:00 pm	Springfield, MA	06/15/2003	04:25pm	Unreserved Coach

Once in Springfield I will catch a Bus to Amherst and hope to be in bed by 9:30pm at Prince house ready to start my workday monday. I just know I will need to "make-up" for time I have spent down at the Honors Institute in DC.

back to the top of this comments page

May 22nd, Thursday, AD 2003 Work on sorting more papers!!

I seemed to be ill most of the day Tuesday and Wednesday. I did get to working on papers today and then up to the Doctors and they are ordering a stress test to check out my heart. It looks like they have not seen any evidence of a stroke as yet. I did go to the 5:30 PM service at St. Peters although I was late geting out from the doctorss office. I have a prescription for medicine, but no money to pay the co-pay part so I will have to go without for a bit. This morning I put in the $40 I had and tomorrow I will attempt to book the train ticket. Then I got a ride up to 44 Berkshire Avenue and the Encampment meeting. We had an informal meeting in the Patriarch's Degree as that is all I have at the moment. Ray LaBorde has the schedual for Sunday. I will be there and hope to get others to come. I can't get to the Berkshires as it will be so wet, but I MUST get things up by the middle of next week.

May 223rd, Wednesday, AD 2003 Church Parish Meeting, and heart troubles !!

I am not going to lodge after all today, my heart is giving me troubles. But as I went to go back to my bed I remembered the Parish meeting at the church and I got the bus over there. It was good, maybe I had not seen the other forces at work around Father Fritsch. I ask all to pray for Peter Fritsch. I am now certain that forces at work there needed to be dealt with spiritually and I did not do any of that -- I just studied my college work and sort of ignored the battle that may have been waged around me. Continue to please pray for the folks at Saint David's as they desire to follow God's direction.

May 20th, Tuesday, AD 2003 Alan Peck, Meg Bellucci, Mitch Gregorski retire with a party!!

I did not feel so well today either, but did get to get the bus and go as far as I coudl to their retirement party in East Longmeadow. Barbara Larkin (2/4th floor lab) saw me walking and gave me a ride up. I was so excited that I finally got "localhost" to work today!!! I can now test server-side scripts without going on a server. Bill Gibbs gave me the ride home. I was so tired when I got in I went right to bed, without taking off my glasses.

May 19th, Monday, AD 2003 Steve Pays for my Meal!!

I borrowed $6 from Steve to pay for my meal at the Lodge. We were going to get Wes, but when we got there, he was going to get his lady (even with the broken down van) as she did not have a way back from her work at 6-flags park. Such a good "hobo" supper at thelodge, I ate extra. I was so tired when I got back.

May 18th, Sunday, AD 2003 Ill !!

I had hoped to go to the Oddfellows Memorial Ceremoney in Worcester, but I was to ill to do much of anything. I got to Christ Church Cathedral for 8am service and then back to bed.

May 17th, Sunday, AD 2003 World's Largest Pancake Breakfast & Degree Rally Day!!

I went down to the world's largest Pancake Breakfast this morning, and then up to Wesley's house. His car is in very bad shape and no money to fix it up again after we hit a pothole. Ray Laborde got Steve and I (whom Wes drove a about a mile to get as he was worried and had not hear from us - we were walking over) from Wes's place and we all went down to Belmont MA where we observed the Independent Order of Odd Fellows 1st, 2nd, and 3rd degrees again. So good to have done this. We had a nice meal afterwards and I sat with the new Director of Nursing at the Oddfellows home in Worchester.

May 15th, Thursday, AD 2003 Another bad exam day!!

Again, thanks for your prayrs, but I fear I did not do well in my exams today. It seems I need to relearn things over and over again lately. This especially seems to be true after the "heart attack" of the end of February..

May 13th, Tuesday, AD 2003 Lousey Presentation at WEBS424 class!!

This says it all. I just know I will not get a good grade in that class. I am so discouraged. Only hope is to do well in the internship.

May 10th, Sunday, AD 2003 Bishop at Church!!

Right Rev. Gordon Scruton came informally to the church today. I was vested but I guess Alan is supposed to be serving. I just did not know.

May 9th, Friday, AD 2003 U Mass. !!

Wesley brought me up to U. Mass and I got a checking account going Looks like all is ok for me to start and move into Prince House June 1st at 7pm.

May 8th, Thursday, AD 2003 Entered the I.O.O.F. Agawam Encampment!!

I received my first degree in the Agawam Encampment tonight. We had the presentation this morning and I don't think it was a good result for me.
May 13th is when we have to present what we have worked on. I fear I will not do well.

May 5th, Tuesday, AD 2003 Project is Due Thursday!!

The project is due Thursday instead of today. There was a make-up exam and I could have done some exams again, but I did not understand that. I found out I had been cancelled at employment as of Saturday. No income at all. .

May 5th, Monday, AD 2003 Lodge Meeting Night !

I attended Springfield Lodge # 235 and Wes was not there. It was voted that Steve Wine and I could assume any appointed office as a pro-tem officer if that officer was not present. We will not meet July and Aug and nominations in Sept, so not a lot of chances but it felt really nice to be so authorized. Wesley arrivd just as the meeting ended. At coliation he said he had been to the doctors and they had wanted to place him in the hospital and do an operation on his heart. However, due to other physical conditions, the chance of surviving the operation was less thatn 50/50. Please keep Wes in prayer.

I have a project due tomorrow, I think.

May 4th, Sunday, AD 2003 Open Pantry Walk day!!

Wesley called me so very early in the morning. I spoke with him and tried to advocate for a total trust in God and not using force to combat force, wheter real or perceived. I am so dizzy today, I can't seem to even sit up to type. I had wanted to go to Christ Church Cathedral, but can't seem to move. I hve lain down much. It is now 3pm and I still can't seem to function or do the work for the Advanced WebAuthoring class. I feel so discouraged. I ask you to pray for me. I could not even get up to go down to help clean up from the Pantry Walk. I like Open Pantry, but I can hardly move today. Wesley had asked I help him this afternoon and I said why not box things first and I could help Monday. If he calls again I will help, but he is also to look at he van's breaks, I fear the ones he put in himself are no good. I hope I can get in to help clean up the lodge after Wes leaves, I would like so much to make a good impression on them. It is 3pm and I am so exhausted. I have been useless today. No chest pains as such, nor the narcolespy, in fact I have never gotten fully awake and I am so worn out all the time. Again, thanks for your prayrs.

May 3rd, Saturday, AD 2003 Church at Saint David's and the Party?!

I went up to the College to try and work on the stuff for the Advanced Web Authoring class. No good, brain just does not want to work. It is so frustrating. I leave and find out I am to late to get the bus to Saint David's. Welsely called back after I called him and he took me to church. After church we took a Lilly to his mom's grave. I had hoped he could drive me to Amherst, but we hit a pot hole and the wheel was wobbling and such so that he just dropped me off near my home and then he went to his place. I found it difficult to sleep. How can I get all of this stuff out of here and up to the Berkshires, the costs of the failed college coureses at Springfield Technical and the rent that is now back due to a tune of aobut $500 and another $168 due now. I also need to pay $1,000 for the family home's taxes. I just don't know what I will do. I NEED this internship at UMass to both learn and to pay the bills. I was so sad that Wess could not bring me up to Amherst, but I was so tired at that time I could hardly get to bed I was so tired. I rested a bit and then got to the computer to explain to the Professor why the donuts and I could not be there and ask if anyone would be taking pictures. I then went to bed exhaused after another shower.

May 2nd, Friday, AD 2003 To UMass and then back !

I went to the Doctor's this morning at the Neuroldogy Clinic at Baystate. We are to have a party at school tomorrow back in Amherst, but I doubt if I can come back. I waited and did not get stuff to HAP, I will go to college and ask if the bookstore will fax it for me. It has been two weeks now that I have been trying to get this information about my finances to them. I wait a bit and a doctor comes to talk with me. About an hour later she goes to get a superior. It seems the Baystate System has lost my records and only sent a few pieces down to them and they can not do a proper review without them. The superior doctor comes in and says that Doctor Howard in not there today and the “the Healthcare System is broken” and has asked me to get copies of all my records form everywhere I have had a test. Then they will view these records. It is highly doubtful that the system can get these records together themselves. I asked if I heard this right that the system was not even 2nd normal and I was told yes that ther was no centralization of the records. I went over to college and went to the last half of a class I had missed Wednesday and then to the Bookstore after asking about the Computer Club budget. I also talked with the advisor for Christian Fellowship and got that budget back to Student Activities. I finished the final forms and made copies, along with my Social Security Card and the STCC college ID. I should have been at the Relay for Life meeting but was still having troubles with narcolepsy. I was afraid of what Monday would bring and told the folks at the Chancellor's office I would be up by 3pm, 3 hours later that I had hoped for. Mark Smith came by to buy something to eat and begged a ride with him to the interstate bus station. Laurie Littlefield, our Phi Theta Kappa chapter President agrees and I am dispatched to the bus station after I get $10 woth of quarters so I can buy the $6.00 ticket. Mark get's me there just in time and I get up to UMass-Amherst at 2:45pm. By 2:55pm I am in the office of my contact person at the Chancellor's office and then we go to the personel people. I am told I need another paper and go to the Five College credit union. I am told there that my check might not have been recieved and the account closed for inactivity. I just got a checkbook out and filled out the forms and opened a new account. Then I took this information back to the human resources people with 3 min. to spare. Then it was raining like I remember Amherst in the summer, “cats, dogs, horses and pigs” (or so heavily you could not see more than 50 foot or so). I was glad I had left the umbrella the day before at the bookstore and had taken it and stuffed a trench-coat in a backpack to take with me. I got out the umbrella and hurridly moved to the bus part at the Mall at UMass. I was directed to a bus in back and tooke the PVTA back to Springfield. I had to take a bus to Northampton, then the B48 to Veterans Mall in Holyoke, and then P21 to Springfield, and then the B7 up to the college. The Peter Pan bus would not come for another hour and would cost $6.00 again and I have paid for the PVTA pass. I was surprised, howver to find out that when I got into Springfield I was only about 20 min. later than the Peter Pan bus would have been. I got to college and did go to see Edith Wild and folks at the tail end of her retrospective reception. I was given some cheese and crackers and punch to take home. I went over to building 13 to see to it that some folks got in and then went to building 2 and then went into Scibelli Theater to see a perfomacnce of “The invisible Invialid” which was done very well. Before the play I talked with Mark Smith that I had seen at the galleria and thanked him for his help in getting me to the bus station. After the play I walked home. I got ready for bed, but Wesley needed some help, so I was up again and then finally I get back to bed.

May 1st, Thursday, AD 2003 I missed meetings and was only present in body!!

What a day of narcoleptic episodes. It was Spring Fling and I should have helped the Alpha Psi Sigma Chapter, but I could hardly be awake. I did not take the make-up exam and I was in so many narcoleptic episodes I was out of it more than in. I found something called “Running a form-to-email gateway” at http://www.lies.com/begperl/form_to_email.html at the very last moment, I had been “out of it” for hours. I was wondering if I would make it thought the day. At 2 I left for the bookstore and Richard and I will both try and code something. I just can't seem to remember much today and I am scared. I got e-mailes wondering where my stuff was, so I will hope to get up there with paperwork today. I fear I must rush some of it together. I missed a very important meeting at Christ Church Cathedral and went up to Saint Peter's for an evening meal this week and the weekly Thursday Mass at 5:30pm. Then it was back home and Wesly called asking I help him move some other things. I stayed at the bookstore for a mystery man that was to arrived yesterday (I had stayed there also) and it was a Mr. DeRiss that wanted to buy the family home. I do not want to sell the family home, I want to repaire it and live there at least part of the time.

April 30, Wednesday, AD 2003 I have had such a horrible day !!!!!

I went to help with the High School students and was told there is a problem with the bill for PTK international convention. Oh will things ever end. I was having narcoleptic episodes all day and Wesley needs to be out by today. He dictated a letter to me and I tried to write it. We brought stuff over to his "wife's" place she is staying. I got back and was so tired. I did revise the letter for Wesley. Oh I wish I could think. It seems I cam trying to learn things I learned before all over again. I don't know if I am having little strokes or what.

April 29, Tuesday, AD 2003 Darcolepsy and Heart troubles!

I went to Healthcare for the Homeless to see about a TB test since they were not in yesterday evening. They did the test and asked me to make a chart telling of all I did and when my troubles happened and make certain I keep my May 22nd and May 2nd appointments. I made the charts at college but I did not do much in classes. I thought we had an exam Thursday, but it was a make-up exam and I did not know that and had not arrainged for an exam. Hence I lost out. I was having narcoleptic episods anyway and oh I am so discouraged. I missed the date for withdrawing from classes. I spoke to our teacher in one class and I can not get an incomplete now that I have a job this summer, so that is another "F" and the only way to redeem things is to take the courses again and replace the grades. I feel so bad and have had chest pains and heart pains and naroleptic things aternating all day. Maybe I can put something online but I don't think I have the strength.

April 28, Monday, AD 2003 I hurt and am so sick!!

I should code things, but I can't seem to do anything. I had so many narcoleptic episodes and I can't breat h well and am so tired and my chest hurts. I fear I am a failure at so many things. While at work I met with Laurie Littlefield in the lobby right outside the Bookstore so I could be called to work on something if needed. We make some plans so she coudl put in a budget. I gave her a copy of what I had done for the Christian Fellowship so she would have something she could easliy work on with her computer. We talked of much else also. I went to the Health Care for the Homeless after work but they are not open mondays any more and I am to come back at 8am tomorrow. I want to talk with Judy Mealy about my heart. She knew me form when I lived at Worthington House after I had been living in my car and was going to the Massachusetts Career Develeopment Institute to learn bout printing skills, especially with the computer. I am scared. The pains keep coming back and I have had a really rough last 4 days! I can't study, I am so tired, my grades can only go down hill. I was asked to go on the bus to Boston to protest the budget cuts, but I don't know if I can physically take that trip on a bus!!! I am writing this so you know what has been happening with me. Please Pray for me!!! I think daily of Heidi and pray she is ok.

April 27, Sunday, AD 2003 Service at the Cathedrals!!

I got up early as Wesley called to talk. I had also been working on some plans for a barn at the family homestead. At 10:3am I got to Christ Church Cathedral and witnessed a double baptism, the rest of the service, and then walked down to the cathedral of Sts. Peter and Paul (Russioan Orthodox) and had a nice time there. After the service an easter egg hunt had been organized. I praise God for this man and his re-introduction of some Russian and Orthodox traditions that had not been held there in a while. He had been a monastic. I did not feel well and walked around a bit, at the trian station, the new transportion place and then back to Christ Church Cathedral for a Sacred Gathering for those touched by Cancer. I was having heart problems and had been near the emergency room of Baystate, but I had no prior authority as a MassHealth person to go so I went back and tired to visit with Diana Grau--but she was out. At the Sacred Gathering I was prayed for by Father Park, his wife, and another trained intercessor. I am trying to trust God for this heart thing. So much pain. I started to go home but walked by my building and went to the Salvation Army. Once again I felt the pains and thought I might die, so I wanted to be in God's house if that was to happen. I did not want to be alone as Bill Zimmerman was when he had the heart attack that took him.

April 26, Saturday, AD 2003 Sleep, Saint David's and then Sts Peter and Paul for Orthodox Easter!!

The Springfield Rescue Mission was my first stop this morning and I took home some muffins as they said they would just throw them out. I should of gone to other places and to box up things, but I was too tierd. So terribly tired. Also a great pain hit me this afternoon. I could not move much at all. Wesley thinks it was another heart attack. It felt like a trouble with my shoulder blade on my right side. I took the bus to Saint David's as Wes indicated he could not drive there. I got a ride back with Fr. Dee Bright as it was the Saturday in Easter Week, but we had the lessons for the 2nd Sunday after Easter. I tired to rest and then walked down to Saints Peter and Pauls Russian Orthodox Cathedral on Carew Street. It went on util about 2am. Then we went downstairs for the blessing of the breads and then a break-fast community meal (pot-luck type) and I had a really enjoyable ime. The new Priest is really neat. I talked with his daughter, Barbara and I was invited down by other people of the church. I felt so comfortable there. Lord willing I will go back tomorrow at noon when they have thier Easter service.

April 25, Friday, AD 2003 Second UMass letter arrives and lots of papers!!

I have about 30 peices of paper to fill out and a TB test to get done. I was not successfull at contacting UMAss health service about the TB test, I will try again later and maybe go out to check on the Neighborhood Healt Services.

April 24, Thursday, AD 2003 Good News, I have been selected for an Internship at UMass !

It looks I will be able to learn at UMass this summer as an intern. I just hope I am up for this. The paper work should come soon as the e-mail came today and anothre letter .

April 23, Wednesday, AD 2003 I did not go to college but waited for an inspection!!

The inspection did not happen until 12noon, and then it did not happen then. I had piled stuff up so the man could get in easily and he said he was afraid things would fall on him. An irrational fear I think. At any rate the apartment did not pass as it was not inspected. I lost about 1/3 of my weekly income waiting for the fellow with no hope to recoupe it. What's more the toilet failed that morning, but since he would not come and inspect it I will have to try and fix it myself. It was going down slowly, and he suggested I put a lot of dish washing soap in the toilet to help things "move along" --- all that did was stop it up completely. A friend said he would help if I helped him. We will try to move things this weekend. Yesterday we brought some of my things from the college to the Lodge and some of Wes's stuff to storage from the Lodge.

April 21, Monday, AD 2003 Off to Lodge!!

Wesley brought his wife, Jennifer and her friend Sandy to the suppe meal at IOOF Lodge # 235. I arrived at about 7:15, Wes had called but I said I would come for the meeting but not the meal. I had not been able to get a hold of Shawn Dupee and I was so tired. There was no college today, Bunker Hill day I think. But I spent most of it resting. I really worked to hard for the heart Sunday. Steve arrived and had a meal at about 7:30 and we all went into the lodge meeting, which was an open meeting, at 7:45pm. At the meeting I agree to help with Wes and Ray to design a simple ad for the North American ConClave souviner book.

April 20, Sunday, AD 2003 Easter Church Service and Holiday Dinner Service!

I went to the 8am Early Morning Easter service at Christ Church Cathedral and then walked up to Puntame School to help with the holiday meal. I feel so poorly.  I got the instructions and relpeated instructions to about 40 volunteers that helped to serve the homeless and needy at this meal. After this was over at about 1pm we cleaned up until 2pm. By 3pm we were through and about an hour later we could leave the kitchen after many minutes of hard scrubbing. They insisted on giving me much food, but I can't use it and don't have the funds to bring it to the Berkshires.

April 18-19, Friday and Saturday, AD 2003 No Money and so many places to be!!

There are so many things to do today. After class I got home and was so tired I did not go out much at all. The next day I stayed and rested, my heart does not seem so well. Steve said he would call if he needed help before the holiday dinner and I had agreed to help prepare and had to back out. I attended the meal at Loaves and Fishes and then the 5pm Good Friday Service at the Cathedral. I passed out often and almost fell twice. I had to tell Steve I could nto work Saturday and went home to bed. I spent most of my time in bed all day Saturday so I could be strong enough to work Sunday. The one thing I did go out for Saturday was a trip to Saint David's to be Lay Eucharistic Minister for Father Dee Bright at the 5pm service.

April 17, Thursday, AD 2003 Taxes sent out!!

I had made copies of the tax forms, but then did not send them out. Narcolepsy is like that. So I sent them out today. So much to be done and I promised to have a site up by now of the trip to Anaheim, CA - but now it looks more like May 15th before I get this up.. I went to the 5pm Maunday Thursday service at Christ Church Cathedral tonight.

April 16, Wednesday, AD 2003 Induction at Bunker Hill Community College!!

This morning I awoke with great soreness of throat. I did not go to college but went instead to the “Walk-In” at BayState's Mason Square Neighborhood Health Center, where I am a patient. I was ther at 10:30, it does not open until 10am and I waited until then to call. I told them I was there and “took a number” and one hour later, 11:15 or so I was summoned to the Registration desk. About an hour later, near 12:10 I was brought in to have my temperature taken and Blood Pressure read and some prefunctory questions asked. Then I went back again tot he waiting room until 1:10pm when I was brought into an examination room. I had intended on taking the 1:15pm bus to Boston. I waited there until 2:20pm when the Doctor arrived. Some quick questions were asked, a throat culter taken and I was told I probably did not have strep throat but just a cold. I mentioned I had to get the 3:15pm bus out of Springfield to Boston and it would take me about 25 min. to get to the interstate bus terminal from the health center. The Dr. indicated that this was understoon and at 2:25 (five minutes after the Dr. arrived to consult with me) I was ushered out into the waitng room again. At 3:05pm (when there was all hope of getting to the bus gond, I left and went to a Bank to cash a check to get money - I felt I might be able to get a train. I was back at 3:11pm and waited until 3:18pm when I went to the window after another lady had asked about her case. The lady there looked and did find my record and then insitsted on reading the notes to me. I told her this is the same as what the Dr. gave me verbally, drink plent of fluids and get pleanty of rest. I signed for the discharge and raced out to catch an local bus to the interstate bus station in hopes the bus had not left. No luch, the bus left on time for Boston. I went to the train station around the corner, and they were having a train come in at 4pm and it would be going to Boston. I took that train--normal charge at $29 but since there were only 3 stops before Boston I got a reduced rate of $26. What a joy to be on that train. I had worried about the cost and that I would get there late. But I am a regional officer of the Phi Theta Kappa New England Region, and the Bunker Hill chapter had helped us and I wanted to be present, at least to shake hands. So here I was on the train. I will attempt to later make a page somewhere about this great trip to Boston. The upshot was that I got there, took some images, made contact with some new inductees and then tried to catch the 8pm bus back to Springfield. I mis-read the sign and got off one station to early, so I missed (or thought I had) the 8pm bus. I waited around and walked around Boston a bit and talked with the Starlight Gospel Mission to the homeless and needy that had come down as they do once every month form New Hampshire to help in this mission to the homeless and needy around Boston's Common. I was on the 10pm bus back to Springfield and arrived at about 12am, and arrived at my apartment at about 1:30am (I walked and was quite tired). I had intended to tell some on the trip of the Rural Christian Conferrence and the statement of beliefs with a prayer request with comments on its initial call like I had given out on the train, but I did not.

April 15, Tuesday, AD 2003 Back again to Evening Prayer at St. David's!

I got a ride with Seve Wine over to evening Prayer at Saint David's tonight after a full day at college and some helping at the Loaves and Fishes Kitchen moving some boards for them. Oh did my heart hurt from this effort..

April 14, Monday, AD 2003 as officiant at Evening Prayer !

There seems so much to do. I am to officate at Eveing Prayer at Saint David's and I think Wesley brought me, but I am writing this towards the end of April and can't remember. I am so concerned about the tax forms due tommorrow and I am told I can not get any financial aid for college. I will need and beg for a copy of those W2- forms as I do not think I received them in the mail.

April 13, Sunday, AD 2003 No Money and so many places to be!!

There are so many things to do today. The Rural Christian Conferrence statement of beliefs with a prayer request with comments on its initial call and formation as found in the outside of the brochure that tells about this ministry to be distributed. A trip to the Berkshires to go to a meeting at St. George's Episcopal Church, where I am thier acting webmaster. A trip to Manchester, NH and their Phi Theta Kappa induction ceremoniy giving support as was suggested at the Phi Theta Kappa International Convention, and as a Regional Officer for the Phi Theta Kappa New England Region. And trying to map out an area in the Berkshires for me to put my belongings that I have down here in Springfield. Well the trip to Manchester would be about $72 with $36 just to get up there, and then two bus rides to Boston and then to Springfield to get back by about 10pm. The trip to Lee would be only about $15.00 and yet I do not know if I should be there. And the truth is that I need to spend money on the computers so I can use them, the hard drives are completely full. I have lessons to do and I am having so many difficulties with the heart. There are various questions. One is what I can do financially. The other is what I can do physically. The third is where I can be of the most use - making the assumption that I might not be able to alter the future and if death is a probablilty, how can I best contribute to llife while I am here. I have written a letter to be mailed to Heidi's parents to get a floppy disk with the mural image she asked me to take in Albuquerque, NM to her. But I have not gotten very far with much of anything for college. I have an exam Monday I need to study for. The combination of the heart attack new life and the narcolepsy are moving at odds with each other. I need the rest, but the narcolepsy does not give it. The heart attack rersiduals give more stress that does not allow me to rest like I used to before. On top of all of this is the letter that said they are planning on terminating my rental assistance, and thus my rent here by the end of this month. It is so hard to even try and lift a box any more. Soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Glory be to God, I know better days are comming. It is now about 6am and I still do not know which way to go today. And then there is the Cogan Computer Fair today at the Basketball Hall of Fame, and the admission gives a discount ticket to the Hall of Fame. And if I think of some it I cn probably find about 5 o ther things to do, not even thinking of grocery shopping. I seek your prayers. There is so much to do, classes to make up and I just do not seem to be able to function like I did before the heart problem. It seems I need to lay down and rest all together to much these days. I have appointments in May for Doctors and it looks like the Neighborhood Health Center will not do anything until the May 22nd appointment. The college has cut my tutoring hours in half, now only 5 hours a week So I get a paycheck of about $70 or less for every two weeks of work. I have about 35 hours left on the bookstore account (the college only allows part-time folks to work 962 hours in a year and using a fisical year I have already worked over about 925 hours or more. Thanks for your prayers. I will put a link up soon of the many bills I hve due now.

I did go to St. George's in Lee and was at thier parish meeting taking photos. Later Alice Davis took me over to the family homestead, I was so disheartened, the area I wanted to put things was under about a foot and one half of water and ICE. I will get a ride the next morning to college, Lord willing.

March 27, Thursday, AD 2003 Train tomorrow!!

So much to say and do, so little time. I have had Alice Davis transcribe a note telling of a ministry I felt God was asking me to start back in 1981. Now that I am taking the longer train trip across the US maybe I could present this concept to people (along with the statement of beliefs with a prayer request opportunity) and hence will be taking some copies with me, if I get the made up now. This link is to the outside of the brochure that tells about this ministry. I have so much to do today, and a summer internship interview for tomorrow. Then I leave on the train at noon. I have placed a link to a Microsoft Word 98 (mac) document that is my Itinerary here. I might not be able to update this again until I get back. I hope to buy or rent a didgital camera as mine was borrowed by a freind and he does not know where it is as he is moving. Please do pray for me. Thanks I desire to do the very best job I can at the Phi Theta Kappa International Convention, and as a Regional Officer for the Phi Theta Kappa New England Region.

This link is to a Word document Itinerary for Charlie's trip to the Phi Theta Kappa International Honor Society for the Two Year College Convention in Anaheim, CA
and where he will be both there and on the train to and from.

March 24, Monday, AD 2003 Train Ticket Paid for, and I must come back Friday, April 4th!!!

I went get the train ticket to the Phi Theta Kappa International Convention in Anaheim, CA. I had found that my room was paid for thourgh Saturday night after all, but to change my plans would mean a penalty of an additional $230 or more. So I am committed to be back here by April 8th. I got some money out of the bank, since a good Pastor gave me some money to eat on, and I took all the othr money out and will deposit a check tomorrow. I might not be able to draw on it for days. I had about 9 dollars left over after buying the train tickets, and used that for milk and soda and cheese. The train fares show they are charging me a total of $109.65 as a special discount price for all Amtrak trains from Springfield to Los Angeles through and with a train change in Chicago. Then there is an additonal $5.10 for the 32 mile trip from Los Angeles to Anaheim, CA. The charge coming back to Springfield in April, however is much more (maybe because it is nearer Easter) and that fare from Los Angeles to Springfield, through Chicago is $152.37 with an additional $5.10 for the 32 mile trip from Anahiem to Los Angeles. So $109.65 and $152.37 makes $262.02 with the additional unresearved trips to and from Anaheim of $10.20 the total is $272.22. I had about $300 in all the banks and drew it all out to pay for the train. I had a loan of money and that check will be put in the bank so it can be used later. I will study, but I will rest also and I will bring liturature about the Rural Christian Conferrence. I ask you to please pray for me. I have a vascular test tomorrow and a CAT scan Wednesday. Thanks.

March 23, Sunday, AD 2003 Manchester Community College PTK Induction!!!

I went to the Phi Theta Kappa induction at Manchester Community College, and this was my first time representing the New England region, along with veteran Diane Hutchins and newcomer William Newell. Kimber was acting aas a chapter officer, but she was there and al 4 of us shook hands witht he new inductees. It was a great time with a Dr. talking about heat diseasease and how by our diet change much of this could be preventable. This got my attention alright. This link is to a listing of the PTK New England Regional Officers elected at the Spring Convention.
I went to the soup kitchen and then to the Salvation Army for services. My heart hurt so much I just wanted to be in the House of God should I not make it through the next few hours.

March 21, Friday, AD 2003 Train Fares go UP by the MOMENT!!!

I went to check on the reservation and the train fares had gone up to $360+ dollars. As the lady was checking as to if I had a reservation on “hold” the rates went up to $430 some dollars and by the time she had put in the right stuf it now was $494.00!!!! She could give me a reduced rate of $370.50, but that also was non-refundable. I have until March 24th to pay that. I e-mailed the person that is loaning me the money and told them.
Then it seemed like somehow I should check about an earlier train. I guess it was God that told me to look into it. I did and if I leave the day before, Friday the 28th at noon, then the fare is again (a disabled non-refundable rate) of $272.22. Well I put a reservation hold on that one in a heart-beat and it just means I will be out in CA a day earlier.I praise God about this and have revised the scheual that is linked below. I still need the money to do this, with the resservation and convention registration it will be about $$600-$700. And I need abut $300 for my rent and money for the college courses. But this is a “once in a life time” opportunity and I want so much to do this. It might be my last “trip” of that kind. Also I am begining to feel again that I need to move on the ministry I thought some 22 years ago that I should be doing. So this trip is not only a time to read on the train my school books, but also a time to reflect on this Nation that God has blessed and come to terms with what God would have me do from this moment on.

I arrived in Springfield, MA in July of 1994, seeking employment to help keep the family homestead in tact. Papers were signed by 1995 that took most of that away from me and in 2000 final papers got signed, after a lawyer's delay. I then saw most all of the land sold in 2002 and I got NO money out of that sale, just some taxes paid on what was left of the house and land it sat on. But the sewage and the water were now sold. So if I can ever live at the family home again is another story. God is in control and I thank Him for all his blessings. Please look at the schedual below that I have revised. It will show my itinerary both at the train and elsewhere and this is the scheual I will revise if need be.

I expect to leave Friday, March 28th at Noon and arrive back here before classes on April 8th. Please keep me in prayer.

Proposed Train Travel from Springfield, MA to Anaheim, CA.
From	Leaving	Time	Train #		To	Arriving	Time	Comments
Springfield, MA (spg)	Fr. 3/28	12:10pm	449		Chicago, IL	Sa. 3/29	7:00am	912 rr miles
Chicago, IL (chi)	Sa. 3/29	3:15pm	3		Los Angeles, CA	Mo.3/31	8:30am	2,256 rr miles
Los Angeles, CA (lax)	Mo.3/31	9:30am	768		Anaheim, CA	Mo.3/31	10:43am	32 rr miles
Anaheim, CA							Total	3207 rr miles

Proposed Train Travel from Anaheim, CA to Springfield, MA.
From	Leaving	Time	Train #		To	Arriving	Time	Comments
Anaheim, CA	Fr. 4/4	4:57pm	583		Los Angeles, CA	Fr. 4/4	5:45pm	32 rail miles
Los Angeles, CA	Fr. 4/4	6:45pm	4		Chicago, IL	Su. 4/6	4:36pm	2,256 rail miles
Chicago, IL	Su. 4/6	7:45pm	448